Link to ad: https://repository.duke.edu/dc/adaccess/T3155
Introduction:
Attention getter: Reference that Adam Sandler movie Bedtime Stories
Thesis: This ad is trying to catch the attention of (white) women wanting to travel alone. It strongly
emphasizes the safety of women on their trains while telling them a story about how much they’ll
love staying there. The ad implies that the world is full of scary people, presumably men, who want
to hurt women. It’s trying to scare women away from traveling alone with any other company while
also trying to entice them with the train’s comforts.
Credibility: My name is Ally, and although I’ve only been studying this ad for a few days, I’ve been a
woman for a little longer than that.
Preview: We’re going to look at the words and image in the ad.
Transition
Points:
- Words
- Script font: Feminine
- Vrooman’s chart
- Anadiplosis: “Smart girls on the go, go Pullman”
- Vrooman’s chart
- Anaphora: Sentences start with “you”
- Vrooman’s chart
- Consonance
- Vrooman’s chart
Transition
- Image
- Eye-level: Looking directly, invading woman's privacy
- Vrooman’s chart
- Long shot: Shows full body in vulnerable (and lowkey sultry) position
- Vrooman’s chart
- Open: Emphasizes woman as focus
- Vrooman’s chart
Transition
Conclusion:
Summary of stuff
Clincher
Your thesis is very well thought out and elaborate, and the outline is formatted well in accordance to the example in Dr. Vrooman’s book. You also seem to have an even number of examples throughout the chart. If I had to critic something, I would mention the thesis and getting it cleaned up. Though honestly your simplistic use of pacing has given me perspective, because I was having a bit of trouble with it myself.
ReplyDeleteThe brevity of your outline is very refreshing, and the organization of your ideas into the order they are on the chart is very useful to keep each section defined, and show how those parts of the poster add up to paint the bigger picture. The thesis is perhaps too wordy, but if you understand it already and don't have to depend on reading it, it should be perfectly fine. Very well organized.
ReplyDeleteYeah, this is probably even more organized than mine so you're definitely in the right direction lol. The only thing I would mention is to make sure to make a reference sheet (I didn't do this either lol) and to make sure you know what your clincher is at the very end to let us know when you're done. It seems like you have your speech fairly planned out though so I think everything will be good as long as you have an idea of what you're going to be saying.
ReplyDeleteI think your introduction is great, I love the reference you start off with, your thesis is well thought out, and the credibility is funny but also truth. I think the analysis is great too, just make sure you run through it a few times to make sure your speech stays under 5 minutes because it seems like a lot of info to cover. Also think about why the woman is in a vulnerable position and why the ad might put her in this position for their ad (you may have thought of this I'm just going off your outline).
ReplyDelete